paulette's hypermeaningful weblog


Thursday, November 27, 2008

Spam: Recipe Request, Important Interview and New Song

Dear Reader,

Happy Thanksgiving,

I hope you have a lovely day today.

First off, my friend, Kat, included me in this e-mail recipe pyramid scheme, but I begged off because I send out too much crud as it is. This made her sad. So If you have any recipes YOU use, send them to me, and I will forward them to Kat who will be overjoyed.

Secondly, I did another interview, this time with my friend Mark Hanley.

Thirdly, I have a new cause on Facebook called "Stop Education in Schools", and I made this song to help maintain our abnormally high level of morale.

Love Always,


Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Important Hanley, Mark Interview

Dear Reader,

Here is my interview with my friend, Mark Hanley. He plays music in a band called boatclub, and when he's not doing that, he's doing other things.

P: Hi Mark. Here are the questions.

P: What is your name?

M: My name is Hanley

P: Do you have a favorite letter in the English alphabet? If so, please explain.

M: favorite was W. the current administration has ruined that for me. gotta come up with a new fave.

P: How do you feel about Adam Smith's view of free markets?

M: Adam Smith's view of free markets? I feel sad about it

P: Do you think music is good or bad?

M: music can be a very good and beneficial thing. it can also be quite evil. I feel sad about that, too.

P: How do you feel about ducks in general?

M: I like ducks. they're quite tasty

And so ends another exciting interview. Stayed tuned for another rip-roaring, spine tingling interview in a week or so.

Love Always,


Thursday, November 13, 2008

Important Brian Brooks Interview

Dear Reader,

In an attempt do something really meaningful with my life, I conducted another e-mail interview with a human being.

This time, I interviewed my friend Brian Brooks.

Please let me know now if you have any questions. Because once we get started, things will be so warlike and chaotic that we won't have any time or sanity for questions.

The interview reads thusly.

P: How are you?

B: So-so, I would venture to say.

P: Do you have a bottled hot sauce preference? what's your favorite hot sauce?

B: Definitely Tapatío brand I'd say... at least it is for 8/9ths of the time. Then it's gotta be Crystal™ brand for that 1/9th remainder. I tend to side upon the side of the non-vinegar added sides. Are these the type of questions I can expect from the rest of the interview?

P: Is art good or bad?

B: Mostly okay, at best. It beats doing other things, beating on a dog with the Club™ or burning people in the streets; especially for fey weak artists. Sometimes, I think. But to answer your question further, I might venture to say that art is a luxury item, much akin to a heated cup holder in the brand new car of life. While I don't fully subscribe to the conspiracists theories that the vast majority of art making is a consorted effort to waste art supplies; and kill time for the confused, it is undeniably completely irrelevant to the sleep-at-night morale majority; unless there's a way to stick a commercial in it. Was it the great art critic Maurice Salemnburgh who said "Art is better left undisturbed much as the fanny of a new mom taking cookies from a hot hot oven"

P: Do you think Sky Blue is a good color for the sky, or would another color be better?

B: It's mostly okay, I guess. I'm not really too into colors; I leave these willy nilly decisions for the snot-nosed kids choking on their marking sticks as they create their generic, naive refrigerator art. Perhaps someone else may be better qualified to answer these sorts of questions. May I suggest my friends Carlos or Henry.

P: Do you like to swim?

B: No, I'd much rather eat fries and try to talk to girls named Shannon.

P: Do you have a favorite vegetable?

B: No, but I always like to have spinach on hand. In college, I used to think onions counted as a veggie. This same persistence of miseducation keeps me in the tomatoes-are-a-vegetable camp. I think broccoli's pretty hot.

P: Do you think dogs can really speak english, only they're holding out on us?

B:Perhaps you've heard a shout warning, "Hey don't eat. This nut's, poisoned!"... that sort of communication. I imagine it is frowned upon in the greater canine community. I have seen some usage in commercials, maybe these so called dogs will speak when promised mexican food.

The following are causes or organizations that Brian supports:

The Art of Pillowgoat

Sunday, November 09, 2008

Important Elgar Crostini Interview

Dear Reader,

After my last really important interview with John Kilduff, a lot of readers such as yourself have swamped me with requests to do another wildly fascinating interview. So in an effort to make these readers feel powerful in at least one instance in their lives, I've taken to heart their pleas and interviewed the cultural iconoclast, Elgar Crostini.

As in all of my previous interviews, the interview was conducted via the totally misunderstanding-free medium of e-mail. So buckle up and get ready for the read of a lifetime.

As always, the "P" is Paulette, the "E" is Elgar.

P: Can I interview you for my blog.

E: Apparently, yes.

P: Maybe five or six easy questions such as

What is your name?

E: Elgar Crostini.

P: What are your feelings about bacon?

E: I have very warm warm feelings about bacon. Actually, I am on fucking on fire for that shit and want to marry it.

P: What's your favorite animal to not eat?

E: I've always enjoyed not eating dogs, and they seem to appreciate the extra effort.

P: How do you feel about music? Is it good or bad?

E: Nice; yes.

P: Which do you prefer, driving your car forward or backward? Why?

E: Both ways are good; forward's nice, but sometimes backwards can be a welcome change of pace, especially if you're in one of those moods where you're just sick to death of always having to go forward all the time.

P: Explain.

E: No.

The following are organizations and causes that Elgar Crostini supports:

Music For People

People for Music

Education in the Schools

Foundation for Scholastic Education

Friday, November 07, 2008

Spam: Proposition 8 protest song..."Capable of Monogamy"

Dear Reader,
You might know about California's Proposition 8 passing.  You might also know that it specifically targeted Gay people and their pursuit of Gay Happiness and Gay Rights.
In protest, I wrote this song.
Please sing along with joy!!!!
I'm gay but I'm capable of monogamy
I want to go public with my love
Some folks are afraid,
but I know they'll be brave
and let me be monogamous in peace.
I'm gay
I'm so so gay
and i'm happy
oh so happy gay
cause today's
my wedding day
I'm gay I'm gay I'm gay
what if gays are human beings
maybe they should have some rights
some rights, some rights to be happy
hap hap hap hap happily married
Love Always,

Monday, November 03, 2008

Proposition 8

Dear Reader,
I hope you're well.
I imagine that if you know me at all, you probably already think that gay and transgendered people are human beings much like, if not exactly like you.
It saddens me to see that something like Proposition 8 can gain support and make it on the ballot.  It saddens me because it attempts to treat gays as something less than human beings.
In summary, Let's publicly acknowledge the humanity of gay people by voting no on Proposition 8.