paulette's hypermeaningful weblog

TOTAL WASTE OF TIME!!!

Tuesday, September 30, 2014

Dalai Lama Declares Emily and Paulette's Art Show Most Important Thing in Life

This is a picture of a man.


Today, his holiness, the 14th Dalai Lama declared that Emily and Paulette's art show is the most important thing in life.  On seeing his shadow, he gave this statement.

"Many people ask me, 'What is most important in life?' and I tell them, it's not compassion, it's not friends or family, it's Emily and Paulette's art show on Friday, October 3rd."

Sources close to the Lama say that he came to this conclusion after meditating for two weeks straight, high up on the mountain all by himself.

Monday, September 29, 2014

Paulette to Unveil Greatest Painting Ever October 3, 2014

A curtain is covering a painting.


A couple of days ago, Paulette painted the greatest masterpiece in the history of painting, and she will unveil it on October 3rd, 2014 at the Rise Above Gallery at 8 p.m.

All the people who went to taste school and all those who have natural artistic taste agree that it's the greatest masterpiece in the history of painting.  Said one taste leader on the condition of anonymity, "It's really tasty, so much so that I'd call it the greatest masterpiece in the history of painting."
 
The unveiling coincides with the 6 - 9 p.m. meet and greet of candidates Emily Wick and Paulette Nichols who are running for the Office of Art.

Saturday, September 27, 2014

Emily and Paulette Announce Candidacy in Art Race 2014

This is a poster advertising an art show and political candidacy.


Emily Wick and Paulette Nichols are simultaneously having an art show and running for the Interplanetary Office of Art.

The art show will have their art in it, paintings mostly and some three dimensional art as well.  The show will travel through time, making it four dimensional, so lovers of four dimensional art are encouraged by the show's producers and marketing department to attend the opening and closing.  Incredibly unbelievable new works will be added sporadically, throughout the month, as often as is humanly possible.

On opening night, the general public is invited to meet the artists, Emily and Paulette, who are are also candidates in the general election for the Interplanetary Office of Art, a new position created by the Secretary General of the United Nations, Ban Ki-Moon.  The duties of the position will be mostly ceremonial, but it will also provide some real power with regard to artistic decisions in the officers' own genetically predisposed lives.

The whole meet and greet is scheduled for Friday October 3rd, 2014 from 6 p.m. to 9 p.m. at

Rise Above Graphics
4770 Telegraph Ave, Oakland, CA 94609

(510) 368-7424

Thursday, September 25, 2014

Drawing Shows That Baseball is Mostly People Standing Around

Here is a drawing of people playing baseball.

In the media echo chamber, there's been a lot of talk about baseball and whether or not the players mostly stand around, looking at things while the earth travels around the sun.

On Saturday, Paulette proved categorically that baseball is mostly people standing around when she documented it in her controversial and unflinchingly honest drawing, taking off baseball's mask of frenetic activity and non-stop excitement, removing the veil, going behind the curtain like in the Wizard of Oz at the end when the wizard is exposed for what he is, somebody who mostly stands around.

After Paulette published her findings, the Professional Baseball Players' Association weighed in on the subject with their statement, "We realize that baseball is a lot of standing around, but we care deeply about the health of our players, exercising and training them during the season to keep them at peak performance level in case a play demands their movement."

Wednesday, September 24, 2014

Emily and Paulette's As Yet Unnamed Art Show Is Still ON For October 3rd

Paulette is on the left, Emily is on the right.

Emily and Paulette's as yet unnamed art show is still on for October, 2014.

In preparation for the event, extra stray dogs and cats are being added to the neighborhood along with portable toilets, an emergency medical station, a press area, and a cool shady place with water and a meadow and a beautiful stream flowing through it.

The Temescal Neighborhood is rising to the occasion, brimming with excitement and anticipation and energy and the artistic passion and love for art that has made it the foremost arts community in the world today.  When asked how he felt about Emily and Paulette's as yet unnamed art show, one man on the street replied, "I'm pretty excited."

The opening will be October 3rd from 6:00 p.m. to 9:00 p.m. at Rise Above Graphics


4770 Telegraph Ave
Oakland, CA 94609
(510) 368-7424





 



Monday, September 22, 2014

Paulette Did Her Laundry Last Night

This is a picture of clean laundry.

Paulette did her laundry last night, washing both whites and colors, taking some care to separate colors from whites, but she didn't do a separate load for bright colors.  Instead she put them in with the dark colors.

The washing machines cost $1.75 each, and the dryers were $1.50 each, making a total of $6.50 for the whole basket.

She didn't have to wait to wash her clothes even though it was a Sunday night, what she thought would be the busiest wash night of the week.  "I thought it would be the busiest wash night of the week, but the washers were empty, and by the time my wash cycles were done, both of the dryers in the laundry room were available."


Thursday, September 18, 2014

EMILY WICK AND PAULETTE NICHOLS: They're having an art show



Emily Wick and Paulette Nichols are pregnant with art, and they're having an art show in Oakland at Rise Above Gallery starting either October 1, 2014 or October 3, 2014.  The show will last at least a month, probably a month, most likely a month, until October 30th or thereabouts.

This is a public event that is open to the public, and nobody will be turned away for lack of funds, but financial aid is unavailable.

Because it's an art show, art will be shown.

Rise Above Graphics/Gallery
4770 Telegraph Ave, Oakland, CA 94609

(510) 368-7424

Saturday, September 13, 2014

Paulette's Jackson Pollock Drawing For Sale, Asking Price $100 Billion Dollars

You can take this drawing home for only $100 Billion Dollars

A rare, one of a kind, original drawing by Paulette has been put up for sale by Paulette herself through social media.  It's her drawing of Jackson Pollock, a painting fish found in the Atlantic Ocean.

When asked how she came up with the price, she responded, "I used the Black-Scholes model of pricing."  And when asked what she'll do with the proceeds from the sale, Paulette said, "I'll use it to pay rent and other bills."

Friday, September 12, 2014

Behind the Paint: The No Furniture Painting

Photo by Emily Wick


We've all seen Paulette's "NO FURNITURE" painting and know about it because it is everything a painting could be and more, and so it deserves to be known about, not kept obscure like small, unnoticed things.  But did you know that there's a really interesting back story behind it that goes like this?

Paulette was at Rise Above Graphics at 4770 Telegraph in Oakland, getting her fantastic t-shirts printed up quickly and at a reasonable price when she took a break from watching their production and sat for a bit in the front part of the store, the gallery part.  On the walls and in cases and on the floor and hanging from the ceiling were all kinds of works of art on display.  It was the art show of the GALACTICALLY FAMOUS ARTIST, J. Otto Seibold.

There was a small person in the store who liked flipping and spinning and practicing ice dancing routines, and so Paulette and she started working on their ice dancing routine with earnestness and diligence.  It was all fun and games for at least 3 minutes when tragedy struck, forever changing their lives in unforeseeable ways that nobody could ever have seen.

Paulette's account follows thusly:

"It was horrible, really horrible.  I was swinging the small person, we were doing this move where i was standing, holding her hands, and then she would fall back and to the side and down, and her legs and feet would go to the side. We were just kind of figuring it out, my god, it was horrible, we were trying to get it to be a kind of swing where the small person would swing down to the side and up, it was horrible, I'm sorry about the uncontrollable sobbing...and then, on one of the practice runs, her feet went out to the side and struck some books that were propping up a painting made on glass.  The painting tipped and fell, shattering with a really, really horrific CRASH ...into one million and two pieces."

Paulette thought it wasn't the best karma to be party to art destruction, so she offered to make a painting of an unbroken work still in the show.  She chose the beautiful painting of furniture which was painted on the glass over a framed diploma.  Both works are now hanging low and high on the walls of the Rise Above Graphics Gallery, but get in there quick-like if you want to see them because the building is being torn down to make condos, and they might have to leave the building early because the landlord didn't like the current "Future Home of No Future Weed Cookie Shop" art show that this art is part of.